Post by Del on Nov 22, 2011 9:04:22 GMT -5
Well,
I've been in China for 11 months now, soon-to-be 12 this December. I have developed liver problems because of the toxic environment I live in [the building management has decided to paint every other week, using the type of paint that burns my eyes and lungs when I inhale]; and the place I work at has become largely disorganized with no stable management for the academic team - two trainers will leave, which puts the center at risk for imploding on itself .
I am passionate about 'teaching'; I want to be the best educator I can be so that I may assist others. I don't think Disney English is worthy of my presence anymore. No one wants to listen to what I have to say that will help smooth things out.
NO matter what I do, it will not be acceptable to the Salesteam; so I've begun to not be myself; and I've begun to be unhappy. The center manager is not able to discern how to solve 'the problem', and unable to explore the dynamics of the situation, explore multiple solutions, and effectively evaluate them.
The moment I am unhappy while working with children, is the moment I know it's time to leave.
Besides, my liver is more important.
I officially resigned on Monday, November 14th, 2011. I did so at the same time I applied for volunteer positions in SW Asia. Knowing, deep down, that I would be accepted to at least one of the organizations, I took the leap.
I'm leaving a well paying job to go volunteer [unpaid; a living stipend is offered].
Parts of me are very, very happy, and feel....at ease. A small part of me is afraid, but learning how to trust the flow of things.
I haven't told my family yet. I want to wait until I've bought my ticket.
I will be in Sanglkaburi, Kanchanaburi, Thailand - it's on the border of Myanmar and Thailand, with a large Mon population. I'll be working with under privileged people, some full-time working adults that are trying to develop their community, and a few GED students that have to be test ready for their TOEFL exam. I was told that they're not that motivated. Maybe I can help out with that.
Furthermore, I also feel that it's time to do MY work. I've found the uses of Teaching English - a means, something I can fall back on. But I am tired of watching my unrealized potential in others. I want to do what I know I can.
I know things happen in their own time, but I feel more and more closer to my goal. I know that now I can get started - however small - now is the time for me to get started.
My experience here in China, abroad, has helped the process.
I'm finally ready.
But...
I must confess...
It's getting easier to deal with how I am guided; though sometimes I do throw a tantrum.
I wanted to go to Myanmar or Laos, but I am being sent to Thailand. I recall how I wanted to go to Japan, and was sent to South Korea; how I wanted to start my work in America but was sent to China instead.
It's never where I want to go with regards to doing MY work; it's always been where I am NEEDED. Even the coordinator said I was needed in Sangklaburi to assist the people there.
...Give me a break...at least let me go to ONE exotic place where I want to go...
Then again, I will be going to Spain to do a TESOL course to receive an internationally recognized certificate [the one I have is employer specific]. But it's not as exotic as Laos, Myanmar or Cambodia.
Who makes these decisions anyway???
I don't have a plan for after Spain. My course there is pretty much my ticket anywhere else in the world. SO I am not that concerned.
I'm just happy that I'll be leaving this company and CHINA. The stress, politics, and toxicity of my living environment is to much for my body to bear.
I'll be leaving a lot of stuff behind as well. Letting go is something I'm getting pretty much accustomed to...
~Del~
I've been in China for 11 months now, soon-to-be 12 this December. I have developed liver problems because of the toxic environment I live in [the building management has decided to paint every other week, using the type of paint that burns my eyes and lungs when I inhale]; and the place I work at has become largely disorganized with no stable management for the academic team - two trainers will leave, which puts the center at risk for imploding on itself .
I am passionate about 'teaching'; I want to be the best educator I can be so that I may assist others. I don't think Disney English is worthy of my presence anymore. No one wants to listen to what I have to say that will help smooth things out.
NO matter what I do, it will not be acceptable to the Salesteam; so I've begun to not be myself; and I've begun to be unhappy. The center manager is not able to discern how to solve 'the problem', and unable to explore the dynamics of the situation, explore multiple solutions, and effectively evaluate them.
The moment I am unhappy while working with children, is the moment I know it's time to leave.
Besides, my liver is more important.
I officially resigned on Monday, November 14th, 2011. I did so at the same time I applied for volunteer positions in SW Asia. Knowing, deep down, that I would be accepted to at least one of the organizations, I took the leap.
I'm leaving a well paying job to go volunteer [unpaid; a living stipend is offered].
Parts of me are very, very happy, and feel....at ease. A small part of me is afraid, but learning how to trust the flow of things.
I haven't told my family yet. I want to wait until I've bought my ticket.
I will be in Sanglkaburi, Kanchanaburi, Thailand - it's on the border of Myanmar and Thailand, with a large Mon population. I'll be working with under privileged people, some full-time working adults that are trying to develop their community, and a few GED students that have to be test ready for their TOEFL exam. I was told that they're not that motivated. Maybe I can help out with that.
Furthermore, I also feel that it's time to do MY work. I've found the uses of Teaching English - a means, something I can fall back on. But I am tired of watching my unrealized potential in others. I want to do what I know I can.
I know things happen in their own time, but I feel more and more closer to my goal. I know that now I can get started - however small - now is the time for me to get started.
My experience here in China, abroad, has helped the process.
I'm finally ready.
But...
I must confess...
It's getting easier to deal with how I am guided; though sometimes I do throw a tantrum.
I wanted to go to Myanmar or Laos, but I am being sent to Thailand. I recall how I wanted to go to Japan, and was sent to South Korea; how I wanted to start my work in America but was sent to China instead.
It's never where I want to go with regards to doing MY work; it's always been where I am NEEDED. Even the coordinator said I was needed in Sangklaburi to assist the people there.
...Give me a break...at least let me go to ONE exotic place where I want to go...
Then again, I will be going to Spain to do a TESOL course to receive an internationally recognized certificate [the one I have is employer specific]. But it's not as exotic as Laos, Myanmar or Cambodia.
Who makes these decisions anyway???
I don't have a plan for after Spain. My course there is pretty much my ticket anywhere else in the world. SO I am not that concerned.
I'm just happy that I'll be leaving this company and CHINA. The stress, politics, and toxicity of my living environment is to much for my body to bear.
I'll be leaving a lot of stuff behind as well. Letting go is something I'm getting pretty much accustomed to...
~Del~