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Quiet
May 23, 2010 22:35:01 GMT -5
Post by Del on May 23, 2010 22:35:01 GMT -5
One week to go...and I'm nervous....
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Quiet
May 24, 2010 19:51:26 GMT -5
Post by KG on May 24, 2010 19:51:26 GMT -5
I think it's only normal to be nervous. The thing I admire is that despite the normal butterflies, and well grounded concerns as well, you're really going to do this. It was the same way with your going to Korea, going to college in Florida, and getting your Masters... and all the other exciting things you've done. I greatly admire your ability to pick up and go, and to make your dreams work. Maybe some day soon you will tell us all how you do that? I mean we all have dreams, and ambitions, but somehow... well as for me at least I have hesitated too long on many of them. Perhaps you could write an article for the board about how you found the courage, time after time to follow your dreams? Also how you got it to work out? Anyway KUDOS!!! I'm very proud of you!
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May 24, 2010 21:08:42 GMT -5
Post by Kata Samoes on May 24, 2010 21:08:42 GMT -5
You'll be fine, Del.
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May 24, 2010 21:31:07 GMT -5
Post by Del on May 24, 2010 21:31:07 GMT -5
I think it's only normal to be nervous. The thing I admire is that despite the normal butterflies, and well grounded concerns as well, you're really going to do this. It was the same way with your going to Korea, going to college in Florida, and getting your Masters... and all the other exciting things you've done. I greatly admire your ability to pick up and go, and to make your dreams work. Maybe some day soon you will tell us all how you do that? I mean we all have dreams, and ambitions, but somehow... well as for me at least I have hesitated too long on many of them. Perhaps you could write an article for the board about how you found the courage, time after time to follow your dreams? Also how you got it to work out? Anyway KUDOS!!! I'm very proud of you! Thanks Kim!! It was just 5 years ago that we met, and we've kept in touch for half a decade and have seen so much....it's an honor to be sharing this experience with you. And you bring up a great point and idea - so as soon as I land, I will commit to keeping a log of how things go, even if it's just a few words. Once I get settled I will do an article so as to answer your questions. Thanks so much again, Kim. And everyone here at Spiritsense; you've all been supportive, insightful and authentic. I've got one last performance Wednesday night...packing to do, and then I'm off!!! 6 days to go....
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May 24, 2010 21:31:40 GMT -5
Post by Del on May 24, 2010 21:31:40 GMT -5
You'll be fine, Del. Thanks Kata ;D
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May 30, 2010 1:50:57 GMT -5
Post by Del on May 30, 2010 1:50:57 GMT -5
It's 2:45am and my flight leaves at 7:05am.
I have less than $200 in my bank account, my stepfather just gave me $200, and my sister is trying to send me $300 [to cover some of the cost for an apartment for June].
I am scared, yet I keep getting this fluttering in my stomach, as if it's supposed to be this way.
Kind of hard to release this tension or to even make sense of it; I had 2k at the end of April and it all went to transportation, food, the plane ticket, part of my sublease for my practice, the fee for my bags...it pretty much disappeared. I watched my spending; I made sure I bought only what I needed [food, transportation and three books to study for Pilates and use as reference were the main spending I did] and knew that it would all go, that since I don't have a job, that I am training to teach Pilates, that it would all disappear and that I would have next to nothing once I left for California.
I don't feel the urge to turn back, or to stay or to call it all off; just a large bout of anxiety because I don't know what will happen next.
I'll keep you updated......
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May 31, 2010 14:43:01 GMT -5
Post by KG on May 31, 2010 14:43:01 GMT -5
Well I guess you are in Cali now! How's it going? I am eager to get an update.... I know you are busy, but let us know how you are doing when you can.
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Quiet
Jun 3, 2010 0:00:51 GMT -5
Post by Del on Jun 3, 2010 0:00:51 GMT -5
So! I am in Cali now...and I've only recently been able to get internet.
My living situation is a rabbit hole: the first location I was in, turned out to not work so well. The previous woman that was subletting decided to take her things [which would leave the apartment unfurnished and I'd agreed to a furnished apartment] and now I will have to wait until someone else sublets the apartment to get my money back.
M bank account is overdrawn and I have to return the car rental early to try and offset most of the negative balance [the rental being the one to put it in a negative balance; I'd not consider insurance as I was calculating how much money to put aside for the car]. At least there is public transit in SLO...I'm currently in Los Osos, which is slightly north of all of the lovely public transit; there're none here in Los Osos. So once saturday comes I'll have to make sure I have a place to bunk in SLO until I can obtain a decent income.
I'm staying at someone's house - a former practitioner at the place I just singed onto - and I have no monetary compensation to give her, other than to do cleaning and whatever it is she asks [within reason].
I am looking for a part time job to try and at least put something in my pocket, but what I am hearing is that it's hard because all of the college students get the jobs.
Well, that's my update. I am trying my best to not get in my own way with the whole negative thought process because it will only make it worse. The challenge now is to keep them positive and take it one day at a time.
Del
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Jun 3, 2010 0:18:09 GMT -5
Post by Kata Samoes on Jun 3, 2010 0:18:09 GMT -5
You're on the Path, Del. It'll get better, I'm proud of you sis.
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Jun 3, 2010 1:39:48 GMT -5
Post by Del on Jun 3, 2010 1:39:48 GMT -5
You're on the Path, Del. It'll get better, I'm proud of you sis. I'm trying my best Kata, I really am. I don't know what to do now. My own mother has just declared her undying disappointment and I didn't need to hear that right now....I feel like I'm dying inside.
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Jun 3, 2010 23:45:04 GMT -5
Post by Kata Samoes on Jun 3, 2010 23:45:04 GMT -5
She's disappointed? I'm sorry Del, however that sounds like she feels inconvenienced with your choices in some way, and wants to make you feel guilty about it so she doesn't have to.
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Jun 4, 2010 0:55:16 GMT -5
Post by Del on Jun 4, 2010 0:55:16 GMT -5
She's disappointed? I'm sorry Del, however that sounds like she feels inconvenienced with your choices in some way, and wants to make you feel guilty about it so she doesn't have to. That sounds like a conditioned way a parent would respond. I haven't experienced any of that from the healers or energy workers I've just met and befriended. But I did get a phone call from a temp agency today...so hopefully something will work out where I can I get my own place within a couple of weeks...
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Jun 4, 2010 10:38:04 GMT -5
Post by KG on Jun 4, 2010 10:38:04 GMT -5
Well I answered you on the PM but overall the events are fairly predictable. You knew you didn't have all the money you needed, but figured you could get it... and you can. The apartment fell through, but you have a place to crash, and your friend may not mind a bit. She might actually LIKE you staying with her. Some people do enjoy having a house guest. At any rate, she would not have offered if she minded... or not likely to have anyway. So don't rush off if she makes you welcome, and get your stuff together before you move out. help her with the bills and she might want you to stay indefinitely... or at least till you are solidly on your feet. I don't know for sure, how she feels, and you will have to kind of feel her out on it, but it might be a good idea to just help her pay bills there for a while, and gradually build up your own money, before just running out of there, with very little money. You have business expenses to think of.
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Jun 4, 2010 12:28:48 GMT -5
Post by Stoner on Jun 4, 2010 12:28:48 GMT -5
I've been trying to get to southern california for about 3 months now, to move in with my "adopted" family and try to get things working out for myself there, but i am dispairing trying to get a way down there in time for Ashley's graduation.
I'm not going to get waht i need in time, at this rate, and will probably not get to see ashley till christmas, during her break from college D:
HOPING that something turns up soon, cuz if i cant get there by the 8'th (her graduation and whatnot) I'm going to have to start walking.
I just REEEAAAALLLY hope something turns up before then.
I dont have a clue where anything is in California, but if you're anywhere near barstow, i might have to take a hike and pay you a visit, hang out a little while some time.
If it's way up north, then im not walking ;D
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Jun 5, 2010 0:24:11 GMT -5
Post by Del on Jun 5, 2010 0:24:11 GMT -5
Well I answered you on the PM but overall the events are fairly predictable. You knew you didn't have all the money you needed, but figured you could get it... and you can. The apartment fell through, but you have a place to crash, and your friend may not mind a bit. She might actually LIKE you staying with her. Some people do enjoy having a house guest. At any rate, she would not have offered if she minded... or not likely to have anyway. So don't rush off if she makes you welcome, and get your stuff together before you move out. help her with the bills and she might want you to stay indefinitely... or at least till you are solidly on your feet. I don't know for sure, how she feels, and you will have to kind of feel her out on it, but it might be a good idea to just help her pay bills there for a while, and gradually build up your own money, before just running out of there, with very little money. You have business expenses to think of. Well, I guess it's a good thing for me to be able to 'feel' people out and have a wonderfully working intuitive sense...she's not all that happy that I'm here. Especially since I have NOTHING to give other than do house work...nope, not all that grand. So she said let's wait until Sunday and see what happens. The temp agency hasn't gotten back to me [it's only been one day] so there's nothing I can really do but offer a hand at house work. I have to return the rental tomorrow and that will leave me stuck and cooped up in this house, which I don't want. She has a ton of stuff swirling around in her head that she needs space to work on...and my presence is stirring it up a bit. Where I am now...there's nothing around, so getting around will be really tough. It would be nice if I were in San Luis Obispo city where there's transportation to get around. This is just a funky situation and I don't know what the heck is going on. I was dumped onto her by a mutual acquaintance...I don't think she's all that peachy about it. A couple of nights, ok, but three or four or five nights without any promise of compensation right away...not so grand. And it's not a projection...I can feel it rolling off of her. She's on unemployment was a teacher], has a part-time job, and rent to pay. Anyway, it's one thing for me to feel that things will work out, yet another for others to actually 'see' what I am talking about. For them it's they'll believe it when they see it; for me it's I see it when I believe it. I will respond to your PM in a few...
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